5 signs that you’re with the right partner

sex with a condom

Are you and your partner right for each other? Let’s find out through 5 basic signs.

In any relationship, you are bound to wonder if you are with the right person. Sometimes, you just know that you are. At other times, you cannot pinpoint your areas of concern.

Stop wondering – read on for the 5 signs that you’ve got the right sexual partner:

1 They put your needs first. It takes time for a sexual relationship to settle into a routine. During this time, you will notice if your partner is receptive to your needs – or not. If they are selfish in bed, you might resent them over time. On the other hand, if they are mindful of what you like, what you don’t, and what you need to feel satisfied and loved, they’re a keeper!

2 They are willing to try new things. The first few days of your sex are exciting and explosive, since you’re still learning about each other’s bodies and rhythms. Over time, you settle into a routine that is comfortable and familiar to both. Broach the subject of trying a new move, or changing the location for sex. A committed partner will be willing to try new things, even if they are initially hesitant. If they are against a certain idea, find out why. Similarly, discuss why you are uncomfortable trying a certain move, and watch how they handle your concerns.

3 They are emphatic about sexual health. Sex is a fun game between two consenting individuals. But both of you should practice safe sex. You should be pleased if they insist on having sex with a condom on. Having sex with a condom on shows that they are committed to the relationship and wish to ensure safety for both of you. It’s an added bonus if they choose a condom that enhances pleasure for you both.

4 They do not force you into doing uncomfortable things. Many things that can make either of you uncomfortable during sex. From body image issues to a lack of lubrication, there are several turn-offs that you must take in your stride. But how you and your partner deal with these aspects is important. If you don’t like certain positions, or if you wish to have sex with a condom on, they must respect these wishes. Set boundaries if you think that they are prone to asking for uncomfortable acts.

5 It’s not just about sex for them. A sexual relationship is based on friendship and trust. Your connection is enhanced if you genuinely like each other. It’s a problem if your partner is interested only in sex and not in you. The biggest sign that they are interested in more than your body, is when they want to hang out with you, go shopping, take trips together and do the things that you like – with no demands for sex at the end of it.

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‘Do I really need to have sex with a condom on?’

sex with a condom

This, and other frequently asked questions, about safe sex and the necessity of a condom during intercourse.

1 ‘Do I really need to wear condom during sex? I only have sex with my wife.’

While you can certainly have sex without a condom on when you are certain that both you and your partner are committed to each other, wearing it does have a few benefits. First off, both of you must be free of any STDs or STIs, or you will risk infecting each other. Second, you may still be in your childbearing years. If you already have children, or if you don’t want any children at the moment, you might risk an unwanted pregnancy. So sex with a condom makes more sense in case of the latter eventuality.

2 ‘Sex with a condom reduces my pleasure, but my partner insists on it. What should I do?’

Listen to him! Sex with a condom on protects you both against both STDs and pregnancies. Besides, who says condoms reduce pleasure? Ask your partner to try flavoured, textured or extra thin condoms. You no longer need to complain about lack of sensation. You can also try pleasure gels to derive greater satisfaction.

3 ‘I am almost never able to get the right sized condom. What should I do?’

Keep looking. There are premium condom brands that offer a variety of sizes, textures, thickness and sensations. Of course, finding the right condom is a matter of trial and error, and you are better off buying them in your own country than elsewhere – condom companies customise condom sizes as per nationality, so you can find your perfect fit in your country.

4 ‘My partner is on the pill. Do I still need to use a condom?’

The oral contraceptive pill only protects her from unwanted pregnancies. It does not have any effect on preventing the transmission of STDs and STIs. If this is a new partner, you don’t know if she has any STDs or not. She doesn’t know that about you, either. So do the right thing – have sex with a condom on to save both of you from disease.

5 ‘After sex, I found out that the condom had torn. I am terrified about getting pregnant. What should I do?’

If you had sex less than 72 hours ago, you can take an emergency contraceptive pill that will prevent a pregnancy from taking place. You need not worry if you are already on monthly contraception, since the condom is not really needed for contraceptive purposes if you are. If it has been more than 72 hours and you have not taken any contraception, wait for a few days and take a pregnancy test. If the test is positive, you can ask your gynaecologist about your options.